


Fake Dating In A Coffee Shop

by Ourfandomcrazyuniverse



Category: Starkid, Team Starkid - Fandom, The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals - Team StarKid
Genre: Coffee Shop, F/M, Fake Dating, I had this one planned since July and the on the spot Alice one came first lil, Pre Canon, creep tw, i mean you could also argue for soulmates and past lives if you rly wanted things to be literal aha, not that bad or scary promise just like an asshole
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-12
Updated: 2020-06-12
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:28:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,072
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24678448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ourfandomcrazyuniverse/pseuds/Ourfandomcrazyuniverse
Summary: Emma is fed up of this man coming into her work every day of the week to ask her out, but when the cute black coffee guy asks if she’s alright, she lets her impulsiveness take control to come up with a small plan
Relationships: Emma Perkins x Paul matthews, Emma Perkins/Paul Matthews, Paul Matthews/Emma Perkins, paul matthews x Emma perkins, paulkins
Comments: 20
Kudos: 71





	Fake Dating In A Coffee Shop

Paul was back at Beanies, and back with, for lack of a better name, the latte hottay. He tried not to shiver in line, God how he hated that name, he’d have to think of something better, or go back to ‘the Beanies barista’ or on really sad nights ‘his hopefully future wife’.

But finally he was next in line, with only a one person queue behind him, and couldn’t help but smile when he was around her. Gosh she was just... she was so beautiful... Respectfully of course! And the way she yelled at customers sometimes was so cool and she was so funny the few times he actually got to speak to her. Honestly most of them were when she was in a chatty mood, he wasn’t great at starting the conversation, but he was sure one day, when everything was just right... “One black coffee please.” For now that’s what it had to be.

But today something really was not right. She barely looked up to him, she didn’t respond in any way except a strained hum to his order, and even though still dazzling to him, her eyes had lost that sparkle, that fire. They had bags under them and she looked to be paling slightly. Her knuckles were whitening themselves on the coffee pot she put in and her hands were shaky, although he didn’t think it was from coffee jitters. After all she’d once told him “Our coffee is ‘ground’ because it tastes like dirt.” followed up by “Don’t tell anyone I said that, keep that shit secret man.” He thought she meant about selling out the company but she later revealed she was talking about the pun also.

His eyes kept flitting to her, in what could have only possibly been about five seconds but felt like years, his anxiety and polite meekness screaming at him that it wasn’t his problem, but his heart pushing him another direction. Until he risked leaning in and asking one dire thing. “Are you alright?” He kept it quieter to avoid embarrassing her, or himself if the situation came to it.

Emma was almost startled by the leaning in, if it wasn’t for the very non-threatening presence this tall man emitted, instead she allowed herself to breathe out the breath she’d been holding in as he asked her. Well clearly she hadn’t been keeping her composure as well as she thought, all her other customers had seemed to think she was the same happy working robot as usual though. 

She finally looked the man up and down, searching. She’d seen him a lot, and he’d always been okay. A good tipper, no hassle if she got an order wrong, never not polite, friendly in conversation and always smiling too. She once thought he must be a very happy man. 

Paul started to get nervous as she scanned him, starting to regret asking in the first place too, as if she was looking at him to say ‘who do you think you are?’ That’s when she leant her stomach across the counter and grabbed hold of his tie, slightly tugging him in when he didn’t get the message, or was too shocked, to know to lean in too.

Oh God. Was she going to beat him up?!

“Hey. Did you see the guy who walked in behind you- don’t look!” Emma had to stop herself from adding ‘doofus’ on the end, because of what she was about to do. The guys head snapped back to attention, eyes focused on her, if not a bit wary. She bit her lip, her mind racing with the thought that she could do this on her own, but another part of her brain telling her not to be stupid and that this was a good plan. She let out a sigh. “Well... can I ask you to do me a favour?”

Paul was stunned. Not only was she talking to him, she had a grip on his tie and was leaning in like that and in cahoots with him and her breath had just flown cooly over his face.

Emma took that pause to mean hesitance to her plan and rolled her eyes. “For God’s sake I’ll give you your drink for free.”

“No no that’s fine!” Paul shook his hands wildly before dropping them, not wanting to alert anyone or ruin whatever her plans were. “Yeah, what do you need?” Paul chanced a glance at the man behind him now.

Emma let go of his tie, Paul didn’t know why that felt wrong, but she still stayed leant in, pressing against her palms now. “He’s barged in here every day for like a week trying to-“ she made a gross gagging noise with her eyes straight on Paul “-‘seduce’ me, and he like _really_ won’t call it quits. I don’t know how much more obvious I can be without smacking him in the face.”

“Maybe that’s what he needs.” Paul grumbled, understanding now and extremely displeased with the man behind him.

Emma raised an eyebrow and smiled, not expecting that. She liked him. “Yeah alright black coffee guy.”

Paul’s heart leapt for just a second. Ahhh she remembered him! Then he realised she might have just called him that because it’s what he just ordered.

“Yeah but my boss would totally can me.” Emma muttered, continuing.

Blinking, Paul pulled back just a fraction, a tad shocked. “Even if that guy’s harrasing you?!”

“Yeah yeah I know it sucks but we don’t have time to talk about society and harassment of women and capitalism not caring about its highly underpaid staff and all that shit...” Emma sucked in a breath through her teeth, taking a step back subconsciously for protection before leaning her face in closer to whisper. God this was gonna be mortifying. “... Just... oh God can you please pretend to be my boyfriend?”

Paul just blinked. Then blinked again. That’s not what he had been expecting. But when he wasn’t blinking he was looking down into her deep brown eyes and she looked so... alone. “Uh... Yeah, yeah sure! Course!” He cleared his throat, smoothing his hands down his black jacket. Looks like he wouldn’t be back in time from his lunch break. “Just, erm, tell me what you need me to do.”

Emma smiled, she couldn’t help it, and sprung up on her feet, leaning her elbows on the counter. “Alright! So, stay here when I pass you your coffee okay? When he comes over and starts trying to flirt with me put on a whole macho ‘get away from my girlfriend’ type thing, you know the sort, and like... bully him into going away. I mean I’ve tried scaring him but that sexism is so _deeply_ ingrained in him, ugh.”

Ah. Bullying. Macho. Possessive. Not exactly Paul’s forte. And not a side of him he’d exactly want Emma to see, especially considering it was hardly there in the first place, but he’d already agreed! Besides, anything for her. “Yeah. O-Okay!” 

Stuttering not a great start but she didn’t seem to have noticed it, she was now smiling up at him so... well he didn’t know how, he would have had to guess thankful, it looked almost adoring, and Paul felt his heart drumming, not from anxiety, no, something bigger was taking a hold of it.

The barista, and now his fake girlfriend, passed him his drink and he took it directly from her hands, noticing that she leant forward so her fingers could stroke over his more as she gave it to him, and then he realised what the goo goo eyes were for. She had already started the act. 

So he better get on it! “Aha, thanks-“ He couldn’t bring hismelf to call her babe. It would seem wrong. But at least he said ‘thanks’ instead of ‘thank you’! That was more casual right!? In any case he took the cup and leaned against the counter, smiling down at her and trying to think. Ah acting acting... “So... what time are you coming home for dinner ton-“

“Hey sweetheart, my usual, thanks babe.”

Ugh. Both Paul and Emma cringed on the inside at that, Emma significantly more so though. The man had barged his way a few steps closer, close enough to the register to allow ordering. She didn’t even start his drink, not to mention she had no idea what his usual even was. Instead she moved on to her own agenda, eyes burning dangerously into his. “Look creep I told you, back off. I’m **not** interested!”

Paul was in abhorrent shock at this man’s behaviour. She was just trying to do her job!

“Oh come on baby. I can take you out on a real nice date, promise.” His smile was crooked and neither Paul nor Emma believed his promise. 

That’s when Paul stepped in, blocking the man with his foot, and his arm hovering just in front of Emma. Eyes stern on his. “She’s taken, actually.” That felt weird for him. “Taken on lots of dates, all the time, we actually have one planned tonight.” Okay that felt more natural but he hoped it was still convincing. He couldn’t see Emma, determined to keep a strong eye contact with this man, and he did back up a step, mostly because if Paul breathed particularly hard their chests would probably be pressing together. 

The man looked a bit taken aback for a second... only before laughing in his face. “Oh yeah? She can dump some boy toy she’s been seeing for a few months easy, right sweetheart?” He attempted a wink at Emma but Emma span her head away before she could even glimpse it. 

Getting mad at this man’s atrocious behaviour, Paul stepped fully in front of her. For something that had just sparked in his mind and come more naturally to say. “Actually, I’m her fiancé.”

Emma gave him a shocked look, one neither of the men saw, but then curled her arm around his from behind the counter, in love with his brain, quickly going with it. “That’s right.” She squinted her eyes up at Paul with a ‘you’re so cute you aah’ type of look you have when you wanted to squeeze someone adorable, hoping the asshole saw it before she turned back to look him dead in the eyes. “I told you I wasn’t available.” I mean at least now she had ‘proof’ for her lie.

Paul was dying on the inside but staying strong on the outside, raising his other arm for just a moment to stroke his thumb down the back of Emma’s hand, before taking it away incase that was too much.

Unfortunately, the man was not taken so easily to believe all his efforts had been for nothing. He pointed to Emma’s left hand that was curled around Paul now. “Where’s ya ring?” He pointed out.

Paul was flashing through excuses in his brain before Emma came up with one so naturally he was almost convinced they were engaged. She gave a shocked look and curled her arm further, tighter. “I’m not getting it dirty in here! It was expensive!” She sounded appalled, before leaning her chin against Paul’s arm and humming happily, her smile bright while looking at him but eyes clearly excited only at the thrill of the lie, Paul could sadly tell. “He’s so good to me.” She started rubbing his arm. Why did that feel so _right_ for Paul?

Emma also was in love with the feel of his suit, it wasn’t a dollar store one clearly, nice material. And damn he wasn’t lanky skinny bean guy like she thought he was from the looks she granted, he had some muscles underneath. She allowed herself to rub a few more times more than necessary before it was objectifying him.

The man grunted loudly. Paul felt Emma tighten at the sudden sound against his arm before quickly retreating back to normal. He felt it was alright to bring his thumb back to rub circles against the back of her hand. Neither knew if he believed or not, but as long as he was fully dissuaded...

Paul started to act tough then, it coming up from some deep instinct inside of him, he didn’t like the thought that even though she was, he knew, much stronger and tougher than him, she could still be scared of this man, he was clearly a threat, and instead of letting his arm be looped around, he brought it over her shoulders. Emma leant into his side, playing the part, as Paul nodded. “Yeah? And who are you?” 

The five foot barista he had the biggest crush on was tucked under his arm and just, oh gosh, he was feeling actually protective.

Then she pressed his hand to his chest, holding onto his other hand that he had been holding her with, intertwining their warm, ringless, fingers. It felt nice that she had an ally.

“Whatever.” The man ignored his questioning, speaking to Emma now. “Just get me a mint drizzle surprise large with four shots of espresso, hazelnut pump, chocolate powder, semi skimmed milk and whip.” 

“On it.” Emma nodded, moving away from Paul’s arms to slink and quickly make his disgusting drink. She was distracted by the tiniest sound of a packet hitting something then bouncing on counter to her side. “Here. That’s where you get the chocolate powder to pour on yourself, so they don’t have to do everything for you.” Emma smiled to herself, partially hidden by the big machine. Damn she already kinda liked the black coffee guy, what was he actually a method actor or something?

She was waiting for his water to boil and granted herself enough time to lean over the counter and check in with her co-conspirator, pressing her hand against his that lay on the counter and smiling, watching as he tried not to look flustered and gave a crooked awkward smile back. “Fiancé nice touch.” She ran her fingers up and down the back of his hand, acutely aware of the creep still watching them. That’s why she whispered it so he couldn’t hear, only black coffee guy.

Paul kept his hand planted on that counter, even if his palm started to sweat, he never thought he’d thank God she wasn’t holding his hand, especially after that little preview, and desperately wanted to use his other hand to scratch at the back of his neck or pull at his own fingers. Instead, he rested his fingertips lightly on top of Emma’s, playing with them softly and hoping that faded his nervous energy. “I, er, hope that wasn’t too much.”

“Oh no no, it wasn’t.” She beamed up at him. “Not at all.”

She honestly thought she’d let him, albeit him alone, go a bit further than that but then her machine beeped. And as much fun as this was and how she wanted to see where this would go, she wanted that asshole out of her life more.

So she moved to pour his water into his cup, medium not large even if that’s what she charged him for, and saw he was still watching her. Not as pervily as the few occasions she always spotted and shut down immediately but more... observing her.

Damn. Did he not believe her? Fuck! She was gonna get paranoid if this didn’t completely shake him off. Her guy was also watching her but more casually, tapping his fingers against the counter and smiling innocently to himself, then her. Whereas her stalkers grin had never been anywhere close to innocent. Well fuck it, further it was.

Out of the blue, Paul felt his jacket get grabbed and with a small “Woah-“ he was yanked and smushed against her lips. 

Emma had her eyes closed but she had no idea if the bad guy believed it or was even watching. Well she’d show him. She pulled on black coffee guys tie to bring him down to her and kissed him hard and deep. Roughing her lips up against his which were attacking at it a little less than hers, being in shock and more just tasting nice and looking pretty, she brushed her lower lip up his chin.

Paul quickly kissed back, a bit startled but his lips immediately knowing to kiss these ones back. But he kissed her softer, more like what he wanted his first kiss with the cute coffee girl to be like. His mind fell completely off of the acting thing and his eyes were peacefully shut, the public and creeps blocked out subconsciously as he used one hand to very lightly cup the latte hottays cheek, hand barely touching her but lips like she was his soulmate from another lost life.

And then suddenly, Emma felt herself start to make out slower too. She wasn’t trying to jam her tongue down his throat any more but this felt deeper. She wasn’t really showing off, she was too caught up in her own world, well hers and his. His kiss was nice and she hadn’t had a kiss like this in a long time, nor any kiss quite like this ever. His mouth was warm, his hand was gentle, he took everything slow like they had all the time in the world to worship each other. He reminded her of a home she never had. This wasn’t a frenzied ‘meet a guy in a bar’ sexual one time kiss this was...

She let go of his lips, placing his tie back against his chest and lightly shoving him back to stand on his feet, rather than leaning over on his tippy toes. She silently worked and finshed the creeps drink and placed it on the counter in front of him, still a bit ‘woah’. Her body flush.

“It’s cold now.” The guy moaned, holding up his drink in Emma’s face. Ruining her one nice moment. She was so done with him, and by the looks of his face, and the fact he wouldn’t look her in the eye, she could guess that kiss worked. And she felt the anger coming back to her body where it belonged, as she could finally say this without him seeing it as a term of endearment. “Fuck off.”

He scoffed. Paul getting out of his little high leant his arm across the counter, a line between the man and Emma. Their eyes were dead serious on him. The girls looked so angry.

“Whatever bitch. I’ll just go to Starbucks from now on.” He took his cup and stormed towards the door. 

“I’ll send them a warning. Now go I’m busy!” She grabbed cute coffee guys tie, she thought she liked that part of his suit most, and tugged him forward, him getting the message this time and meeting her lips more peacefully. Did she do this as an excuse to kiss him one last time before her excuse ran out the door and she could actually get to know him formally? Maybe. Did she think he minded? Judging by the smile he just couldn’t keep down she felt against her lips, the eager but never selfish kissing back and the warm brush of his nose against the side of her own she didn’t think so.

She also thought most guys would go as far as they could getting a free make out session with a hot bastard like her, but he didn’t, he was... soft. Like he cared about her. About this moment. That vibe is also why she allowed herself to kiss him in the first place. And his soft lips, soft in touch and emotionally, taking in hers was more than enough proof she’d made a killer decision, again.

When she opened her eyes the asshole was gone. 

She might as well allow herself a quick peek at the man she was kissing and from what little she could tell pressed against his face, that she was still continuing to kiss back in her study, he wasn’t being gross about it it was almost... genuine. She pulled herself away with a laugh, smoothing down her apron as she watched him smooth down his jacket. Neither could quite meet the others eye.

“Sorry about that.” She started, clearing her throat and making sure no one was watching them. Her boss wasn’t around and there was only one couple sitting inside. Paul looked around too, for the perpetrator, only to see him gone. Good. Good, he fixed his shirt sleeves that didn’t need fixing. Emma chuckled, pulling a string of hair that had fallen from her bun back behind her ear, speaking to the serviettes. “It was just, y’know, improv.”

Paul would NOT bristle at that because then she would definitely get the wrong idea. “Yeah sorry my acting isn’t very good.” He laughed quietly, scratching the back of his neck and hoping he did alright for her.

Emma responded. “Well that kiss certainly was.” 

They left the other meaning hanging, that the kiss was that good and he couldn’t act.

“Erm, thank you. Y-you too!” He held his hands out for her like an actor at the end of the show and she chuckled softly, moving onto his new black coffee since she forgot she’d already made him one, to be fair Paul did too. “I mean, I don’t really kiss random people a lot. N-! Not that you’re random! I see you like every day!” 

She let him ramble, looking up when it was safe to squint her eyes and tilt her head with a smirk.

Paul rolled his eyes, smiling just a little too wide. “Not that that means I know you! I mean, I feel like we’d get along great! And I do remember the stuff you’ve told me, not in like a weird way obviously, but you know like I value our chats we have occasionally and then times like this.” His heart skipped a beat. “Not that I’m saying we should do _this_ more often. Well unless y-“

Emma took his hands and put them in position, placing his large cup in them and sealing his fingers around the recyclable polystyrene herself, saving him from that.

“Oh. Yeah.” Paul fiddled anxiously with the coffee cup lid once she had let his hands go, his own a bit too shaky to get it on. Aaaah! 

“Hey so.” Emma leant over the counter, no one else around just yet, and she wanted to talk to the guy. “Are you sure you don’t want anything you know more fancy? And by fancy I mean expensive, I mean I’m paying!”

Paul laughed, finally sealing it with a pop. “And back to the whole underpaid staff conversation.” He showed he did pay attention to their conversations in a _non-creepy_ way and also he didn’t want her busting out her pocket for him!

“Yeah well technically I’m just not adding it to the till so...” her smile widened, teeth opening giddily and luring him in to just pick something. Paul laughed properly, he liked that there was a dorky side to her. “No, thank you though...?” He left it hanging, finally asking her name.

“Excuse me!”

That kid again?!

Paul pressed his lips shut, now this teen with too slick hair and too big glasses was staring at him. It was alarming. “If you’ve finished your order, I would like to go now!” He seemed to have joined the line when they weren’t paying attention.

‘What a little cockblock’ Emma thought, before putting on a much smaller customer service smile and quickly getting onto his order. 

She did it fast, almost spilling the liquid on the kid before spinning back to where her black coffee guy had been waiting just one minute ago, to finally answer his question. “I’m Em-“ 

But he was gone. 

Instead she found in his place, a ten dollar bill and a little note scatched into the napkin, she picked it up. 

`“For the drink and a tip :)”`

She didn’t know why, but she put the serviette in her aprons front pocket, at the same time as she checked the front door to see if she could still catch a glimpse of him walking out. 

But he was gone.

Huh. Well she’d have to book a quick extra shift and see if she could see good-kisser-black-coffee-guy tomorrow on schedule too.

**Author's Note:**

> Day 5! Idk how I’m alive!
> 
> They’re perfect they deserve tropes ok, and the coffee shop is pure wonderful coincidence
> 
> Thanks so much for reading! I hope this week isn’t getting tiresome for anyone haha. Please leave any and all comments as they really really do help me and as always, stay safe y’all! 💕


End file.
